Tuesday, April 29, 2008


Pain switch: flipped to On. I took a slow walk around the neighborhood yesterday since I want to be stronger physically and cardiovascularly before and after surgery. And I am reminded why I use the scooter to be out a long time. Bone pain, SI joints, bad. I could trace out the outline exactly, no anatomy book needed. Why is it on skeletons that area seems basically nonmoveable? It's ironic. The one thing that shouldn't hurt does. I am reminded that even if I didn't have my neck fused, it would probably eventually fuse itself. Of course, that wouldn't eliminate the disc pressing on the spine.

Some of the people on some of the spine message boards are willing to have their disability increased so that they can fuse faster (self fusion, not surgical) and eliminate the pain. Some of the immunosuppressants shorten lifespan (this I think is more culpable than rheumatologic illness itself), so I'm not really willing to go that route.

When my pain is this bad, I'm so clingy. My poor spouse can barely get out of the house for a bit or go upstairs.

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